Viscous Cycle

Push

Pull

Wrestling between stay and go

Desire holding one, shoving the other

Like a violent whirlpool both of us tossed about

Never fully up

Never fully down

Still I dig my nails into anything tangible, grasping at some sort of what we used to be

You pry my fingers up one by one

I let go to be taken up in the storm

Wait

Stop

Panic fills your eyes when I go

Panic clenching onto one, despair fills the other

Trembling collapsing to our knees

Not certain

Not in doubt

Still we sit on the floor of our mutual destruction, trying to sort through all the wreckage

Piece by piece finding ourselves

Left with pain, love, hate, and sorrow

Stay

Go

Where do we go from here?