It is in the stillness that I hear your laughter
Sensations of your body close to mine touch me
Echoes of your voice like a whisper kiss my ear
It is in these moments I feel the ache of your absence
It is in my dreams that I feel the terror I endured
The panic that filled me at your departure of life
The rage from your hands that caused me to flinch
It is in these moments I feel the agony I stood in
It is in my solitude that I feel the grief
The mourning for the battle you waged
The anguish for the torture I experienced
It is in these moments I feel the grief for what we both lost
It is in my busyness that I try to forget
The echo of your wailing pushed aside for now
The trembling of my voice as I plead slowly fading
It is in these moments I feel the gravity of what transpired
It is in my reflection that I seek cognizance
The failed attempts at acceptance of what transpired
The silent acknowledgments of what is, and never will be
It is in these moments that I feel my satori, my knowing
It is in my resolution that I stand upright
The grief threatens to knock me back down
The will to survive wells up from deep within
It is in these moments that I am filled with determination
It is in all of my existence
The love I was blessed to know
The trauma that will forever be a part of me
It is in all of the moments, marching to a heart that won’t give in
It is in the fabric of time
The moments are happening now, happening then
The experience we share is existing and never-ending
It is in these moments that I know it was a lifetime I spent with you
foxgloveremedy 